Nowadays, of course, B-pictures are not a thing, but at one time in Hollywood they were a staple. Also at one time in Hollywood, Hal Roach worked with the likes of Charlie Chaplin, Laurel and Hardy, and Harold Lloyd. In the nineteen-thirties he was especially known for his Little Rascals series, also known as Our Gang, but after that was played out he went into teeny-budget B-movies. One of these is Tanks A Million, a 1941 quickie that features some pretty big character actors but no literal tanks. However, there’s quite a bit of fun and craziness to be had.
The movie opens at an Information, Please-type radio show, where Dorian “Dodo” Doubleday (William Tracy) is giving out with the knowledge. Seriously. The host can’t stump this guy. Dodo is an information clerk at a railway station but has a photographic memory, so his ability to absorb and give information is a bit overwhelming. He can also be a bit long-winded. He’s also going into the Army.
Meanwhile, down in the audience, a pretty lady named Jeannie (Elyse Knox) listens in disgust as her date regales her with all the things he did to avoid the draft. It won’t be the last time we see these two, although it’ll be the last time we see them on a date.
As soon as Dodo gets off the train with the other recruits, he’s taking charge. Naturally, he’s read every book about the Army from back to front and knows everything about it, so he starts trying to get the men into formation. The sergeant in charge of new recruits, William Ames (Joe Sawyer), doesn’t appreciate this, however, and spirits the group off to camp more or less without incident.
A private’s one and only stripe is clearly not enough for Dodo, who’s ordered to Officer’s Candidate School almost as soon as he gets to camp. Dodo being Dodo, he finishes OCS before anyone can say, “Forward, march!” because he’s already read all the literature associated with being an officer. Of course.
Sergeant Ames is a little crazy over these new developments. He’s been in the Army for twenty years and had to work for ten years to get his sergeant stripes, while Dodo gets his stripes almost right off the bat. Captain Rossmead (Douglas Fowley) has an idea, though: Put Dodo in charge of Company F. They’re undisciplined. They’re rowdy. They’re the problem children of the camp. In no time at all Sergeant Dodo will be a private again. He’ll be begging for it, in fact.
At first the captain is right. Dodo might be book-smart but sorely lacks practical experience, and at first Company F falls over laughing at him when he tries to order them into ranks. Dodo has a few tricks up his sleeve, though, and soon has the men marching barefooted in their overcoats over a bed of sharp gravel. It’ll toughen up their feet, he says. The men of Company F are sore but hardly chastened, and vow revenge.
Oh, and Jeannie shows up, having enlisted as a camp hostess. She runs up to Dodo as if they’ve been dating for years and makes all the men, especially the ones of Company F, insanely jealous. Plenty more happens, and true to form, it’s a mix of dumb luck and good timing.
Dodo’s falling up streak doesn’t stop there. He briefly works as an orderly for Colonel “Spitfire” Barkley (James Gleason) and inadvertantly makes the Colonel’s radio speech for him. The other officers hope against hope that the colonel will knock Dodo down a peg or two, but Barkley, who has severe mic fright, is incredibly relieved that he doesn’t have to make his dreaded speech.
Tanks A Million is the first installment in Roach’s Streamliner series. As the August 9, 1941 issue of Motion Picture Herald described it, Streamliner films were “long enough to satisfy the public condition to double decker programs, yet short enough to get the customers home by bedtime.”
The film is surprisingly well-done for a featurette. It’s a joyride. It’s got plenty of humor of all kinds, both verbal and physical. It’s got a solid cast of proven comedic actors. It’s almost got a Looney Tunes feeling to it, particularly in one scene when Company F somehow manages to smuggle a Yellow Cab into the camp just in time for guard duty. It’s one of those times when a movie can stretch the viewer’s cred to the breaking point and still come out a winner.
Now, the film does have its weak spots, the biggest one being Jeannie. Elyse Knox isn’t the problem, but her skimpy character arc is, because we go from her sitting in the audience at Dodo’s radio show appearance to her running up to Dodo at camp and giving him a bear hug and a big kiss. When did these two have time to get together? We all know Dodo is a quick study, but it’s doubtful even he can inspire such ardent affection in the twenty-four hours between going on the radio show and leaving for the Army.
Tanks A Million was so popular with both audiences and critics that Roach ended up making four more films in the “Dodo” series, and according to TCM, Dodo and Company F were put into all kinds of interesting situations, one of which involved Japanese subs. The series fizzled out after the war, unfortunately, as did William Tracy’s career.
Roach retired soon after, handing the business over to his son, Hal Jr., who made some extremely poor business decisions, causing the studio to go bankrupt in 1959 and permanently close in 1962. The lot where Hal Roach Studios once existed was demolished in 1963 and the Landmark Industrial Tract now occupies the site.
It’s kind of a shame these Streamliners haven’t gotten more attention, because if Tanks A Million is any indicator, these films were short and sweet joyrides in true Hal Roach style.
Coming up this month (click on the image for more info):
Isn’t it funny that we’re already talking about April? Feels like 2024 just started. Anyway, another post is coming up on Thursday. Thanks for reading, all, and I hope to see you then…
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